Monday is the Pitts!

I had to pull 2 of the cats out from underneath the furnace again today and they were rastlin and putting up a real fight. just when I was about to relax and begin my 2nd romance story, I heard some goons bangin' on the front screen so I says 'Who is it!' and I let them know I had a bee in my side. They kept on at the door and so I just let them hammer away until the inbetweens came on which is just a waste of my time because everyone knows I've already seen those a million times and if I needed some tergents, i would just go into town and get them myself. So I finally got up and was real angry because when I decide to get laid down then it is my special time. Plus I was eating cheesys. Wouldn't you know it, it was Randy Kennyin and his cousin Karl and they looked like they had a devil's amount of trouble up their sleeves. As soon as I recognized them I said 'BUG OFF, KENNYINS' real loud almost in a shrills and then I slammed the screen door so hard it would make their head spins! As soon as I did that I hooked the latch into the circle and then ran to another quadrant and just ignored. If they had seen around the corner, they would have knowed that I was angry by the face I was doing which was real gruff. I sat down real agnry and said 'First it was the cats, now this!' I guess this is why you say 'I just have the Monday Blues'. Luckily, every week Tuesday is soon to begin and then we can just start off in a different and altered way from this crap.

I know it was them that took my kneepads after softball practice and chucked them into McGillicutty's Bog! They blamed me, but everyone knows that I don't throw that far and the Bog has too many horseflies. In the meantime I'll just wait the night out until they leave and if it comes down to it, I can make magnets in the vestibule until those fags BUG OFF!

I'm real happy that baby was borned. It will surely be the gem of hollywood futures. It will be real interesting to see if it has his eyes of blue or if it will have hairs of brown, either way it will surely be the gem of the futrue. It was the only good news that I got today. I guess you could say it was the only thing that washed away my Monday Blues.
If you read this as you grow older, I look forward to seeing you grow into an american jem!!!
Sincer,
Cathy Sampson 1 Women's Journey of the Life

In Emerald Sadness

I guess you could say that I have a heart full of gold when it finally comes down to that bottom line. I was heading towards Mindyville to see if I could find some of you guys off the line and wouldn't you know it The Kennyin Brothers came down the lane just looking for devil's amount of trouble. Well I just new there would be some trouble because everyone in town knows they are neyer'dowellers when it comes down and backaround. Before I knew it one grabbed my hairband and slammed me down into a mud putch. I tried to kick'em but before I knew it I tried to kick and nothing was there. I reckoned the best thing to go off into a magical and on the outside it would look as though i was faking dead and they would just bug off and leave me to my own accord. It was right then that I say the first of seven centaurs each one prettier than the next. The brillent sunrise went unnoticed by them and I couldn't help but notice 2 of the 7 centaurs were garbed in tattered clothing that ill fit their slender bodies and little resembled the normal attire of centaurs I had spoken to in times before now. In my inside mind I said to Cathy 'Those may even be nothing but burlap sacs made into garb'. But I did not judge them for their impoverish. I waved like a normal friend as they were darting silently from tree to tree. 3 of the 7 centaurs raced about and after a while I wanted to kick them and tell them to go lay down. In the meantime, it was best that I just go leaning against the rough bark of a knurled old tree and gasp for breath.

If I only had allowed the unicorn to discover me, it surely would have been my duty to to tame him. Surely she would buck and
such, but i would just say 'whoa girl' until my strenth had tamed him. Then again, if I obeyed the centaurs, their existence on the island might have remained a secret.