Everyone knows i couldn't have been me
Today I got real angry.Two of the Cubbage Putch Dolls were missing from the presentation stage and I KNEW I DID MOVE THEM, they are supposed to stay in the den unless they have a performance show that night. Everyone knows it couldn't have been me, because alls I did for the last 2 days was wait for Lorna to come by and drop off the styrofoam balls I need for next year's elf heads. After I figured it out, I blamed the cats and smashed as many as I could grab with the toilet paper rolls I was saving for the bees. I threw cans of beets at the ones I couldn't reach and then some of them went under the furnace. Those ones are too fast for their own good!Well, after that time I was thirsty so I had an Orange Crush and a chance to have a thinkback and right then I remembered that sometimes dolls can rub their eyes and wake up. Every one and a while they will check their elbows 'n arms to make sure god make them work right. Ha ha. Once they realize! They climb down from the shelf because they need some alone time. Of course they have a hard time walking at first and they get wobbly! But sure enough, they need some explore adventures and they'll figure it out! Normally people are sleeping when this happens. The only time I ever followed them was when I went into a magical and before i know it ... i've wandered into a magic cabgage patch of charms and delight and I am right under a beautiful waterfall of merry believe it or not. Suddenly, all sorts of different cabbage patch babies peeked out from behind conch shells and I danced with them as long as i wanted. Each one had his or her own special look, personality, name and so on and so forth and so from then on out i named them all Louisa and made them look the way I wanted. Then everyone cheered.
posted by cathy_sampson at 9:12 PM
13 Comments:
Yes. Too much variety is a bad thing. Give them all the same name, and make them look exactly alike. Are you sure you don't live in Stepford, Cathy???
Everyone knows where I live you idot
Not everyone. My next door neighbor doesn't know where you live. He thought he did, but I told him he was wrong. He's checking the phonebook right now, just to see if I'm messing with him.
I am, of course. He knows exactly where you live.
Chris
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Unless I invited you you are supposed to not be here. Did i give you an invitation to here at a game? otherwise you aren't allowed.
Yes, Cathy, you invited me here. Don't you remember? I think it was when you were high on hot-glue fumes.
i don't breath the thick in anymore when i am working on things. doc said that is why my face stings when the elfs are in bits.
You can use egg cartons for the elf heads, just cut them up and put them back together. I use a magic marker to put on the eyes and smiley faces but you could use glitter or you could even use frosting left over and just let it dry really long.
I wish that you would clean up the yard Cathy. If you had money you could hire my Lenny to do it but he's afraid of your cats. Its causing some upset people in the neighborhood who are just trying to make a good leaving and have a christian life.
Pam, everyone thinks you need to mind your own P's and Q's. The yard has gardner snacks in it and I ain't goin out there until they freeze in the snow. When I went out there last summer one got inside my sandal and I had to club it in half with a rusty shovel. One of the snake bits was still moving when I got to the kitchen so you can just forget about it.
MMmmmm... Gardner Snacks.
I haven't had Gardner Snacks since I owned that landscaping company over in Lansing.
Chris
Cathy,
I'm going to be in the neighborhood this weekend, and I'll need to pick up those kneepads again. You can just leave them in the ditch like last time.
By the way, I've heard from a few people in town that you haven't been to the last 3 practices. I'm sure Beth told you that the practice was moved to a different night, right?
Anyway, she probably just forgot. I don't tink she's trying to hide anything from you.
Beth, please give me those knee pads. I need them right away. I tried asking Cathy for them but she wont answre her phone or come to the door.
and you should mind yor own ps and qs Cathy Sampson! I didn't forget that you stold the kids pumpkins last halloween and put them into your tempo. My lenny saw you do it and he doesnt lie.
Didn't Lenny spend some time in the Joint for Tax Evasion? That's kind of like lying, isn't it?
Chris
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